
Tickled to Death. 




as 



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SLIM JIM AND THE HOODOO. 1 Act; 30 minutes 5 

WANTED. A CONFIDENTIAL CLERK. 1 Act; 80 minutes 8 

SNOBSON'S STAG PARTY. 1 Act; 1 hour 12 

PICKLES AND TICKLES. 1 Act; 20 minutes 6 

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CASE OF HERR BAR ROOMSKI. Mock Trial; 2 hours.... 28 

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TICKLED TO DEATH 



A Vaudeville Sketch In One Act 



BY WILLIAM AND JOSEPHINE GILES 

Authors of Uncle Si's Predicament, Hoosier School, Bachelor' 
Elopement, Rube's Family, Advice Wanted, Etc, 



Copyright 1916 by Dick & Fitzgerald 




NEW YORK 

DICK & FITZGERALD 

18 ANN STREET 



of Qs* 

TICKLED TO DEATH. 



te 



CHARACTERS. 

Sam Johnson Black face 

Bob Jackson Black face 

Time of Playing. — About 15 minutes. 
COSTUMES. 

Eccentric. 
STAGE DIRECTIONS. 

As seen by a performer on the stage facing the audience, R., 
means right-hand; l., left-hand; c, center of stage. Up, means 
toward back of stage; down, toward footlights. 




TMP92-009239 

9 



to* 



yCLD 44815b 

RFP 12 1916 



TICKLED TO DEATH. 



SCENE. — A street. Entrances right and left. 
ENTER Sam Johnson r. 

Sam. Ladies and gentlemen, with your kind permission and 
approval, I will endeavor to articulate a charming and spectac- 
ular ballad entitled "A Little Powder and a Little Paint, 
Makes a Woman What She Ain't". {Introduces any available 
song. After song looks off l., sees some one coming) Now I'se 
wondering who this nigger am comin', seems like he's done 
lookin' foh somethin'. Maybe somebody rob his hen-house or 
stole his wife. 

ENTER Bob Jackson l. 

Bob. Hello there, friend. 

Sam. How-do-you-do. 

Bob. Say, I'se all done lookin' foh somethin*. 

Sam. Huh, yo' all don't have to look foh it around heah. 

Bob. Say, does yo' all know a gal by the name of Eliza Green 
around heah? 

Sam. Eliza Green, Eliza Green. (Scratching his head and 
thinking) I don't know her I guess, but what kind ob a lookin' 
gal am she? 

Bob. Well sir, I'se can't hardly tell yo' so very much about 
her, only dat she looks like some chicken to dis nigger. I'se met 
her down at de beach de other day and she done asked me to 
call around this afternoon and see her. She said dat her hus- 
band run de barber shop on de cornah. 

Sam. Is she de gal dat goes bathen down at de beach so 
touch? 

Bob. She sure am de chicken. 

3 



4 Tickled to DeatK. 

Sam. Well, what r do yo' all know about daL 

Bob. Then yo' all know her, huh? 

Sam. Well, J know de gal dat done goes bathen down dar 
so much, but I'se all didn't know dat it was de barber's wife. 

Bob. Well, dat am her all right. 

Sam. I never in the world would hab known her with her 
clothes on; oh I know where she lives, why she lives up on 
Easom Ridge. 

Bob. Easom Ridge? Where in the debble is Easom Ridge? 

Sam. Well, yo' all see dat cornah down dar? (Points R.) 

Bob (looks off r.). Yes sir. 

Sam. Well, dat ain't de cornah. (Points off l.). Yo' all see 
dat cornah up dar? 

Bob (looks off l.). Yes. 

Sam. Dat's de barber shop. 

Bob. What barber shop? 

Sam. Dat chicken's husband's barber shop. 

Bob. I'm not lookin' foh her husband. 

Sam. Well, then, yo' all had better take up dat alley befoh 
yo* done come to dat cornah and cut out de alley back ob de 
barber shop to de road, and then go out dat road foh about, let 
me see, about two miles 

Bob. Say, do yo' all know dat I'm goin' to walk? 

Sam. I'se don't care how yo' go, walk if you want to, I'se not 
ide street car company heah, or running any jigney bus, no how. 

Bob. But just think, two miles, why, nigger, I'se can't walk 
idat foh. 

Sam. Yo* all better let dat man's wife alone, den. 

Bob. But I done promised I'se would call on her. 

Sam. Does yo* all know her husband? 

Bob. No sir, I never had de pleasure of meeting him. 

Sam. Well sir, nigger, when yo' all see dat gentlemen, yo* will 
clone change yoh mine about callin' on dat chicken. 

Bob. Why, am he a scrapper? 

Sam. Scrapper ? Yo' all won't have to look at him de second 
time to know jist what he am, and if dat nigger should catch yo' 
sat his house, huh 

Bob. What will he do? 

Sam. What will he do? It's all done good-night nigger, dat 
is all, they won't be no argument about it. 

Bob. But what will I do? I done promised her I'se would 
clone call. 

Sam. Go ahead and call on de chicken, the pleasure am all 
yoh own, but if I'se was yo', I'de done go right away and take 
(out de biggest accident insurance I'se all could get a hold ob. 



Tickled to DeatH. 5 

Bob. I'se all not lookin' foh any trouble. 

Sam. Yo' all won't have to look foh trouble, yo' Hone won't 
have time, so have everything ready befoh yo' all go. 

Bob. But he wouldn't hurt a man unless he meant to make 
him trouble, would he? 

Sam. It don't mean any trouble when a man goes to see an- 
other man's wife, huh? Now, I'se all tell yo', friend, yo' had 
better take a fool's advice and stay away from dat man's house, 
dat am all I'se got to say to yo', but if yo' all mean to go 
and if yo' am bound to go, and if yo' intend to go, why, yo' 
done take dat road for about two miles and yo' all will come 
to a big white house painted green with a bay window in de 
back porch on de thum hand side ob de fence along de roadside. 

Bob. Is dat where she lives? 

Sam. No. 

Bob. Well, where does she live? 

Sam. In de sixed house on dis side, but I'se all done told yo' 
de truth, stay away from dat man's house. 

Bob. I'se don't think dat nigger can hurt me. 

Sam. No, he won't hurt yo', yo' will nebber know he hit yoh. 

Bob. Dis nigger am a good scrapper too. 

Sam. Yo' all will change yo' mind when yo' see dat woman's 
man. 

Bob. Well, I'se got to see de first nigger dat I'se afraid ob. 

Sam (looks off r., then points off). Look, look. 

Bob (looks off). What? 

Sam. See dat guy standing on de cornah up dar? 

Bob. Yes. 

Sam. Dat's de guy. 

Bob. Who? 

Sam. Dat's de chicken's husband. 

Bob (starts, frightened). Sudden death by explosion, blown 
up on de war-ship, hit a can ob nitre glycerine, and forget yoh 
livin'. (Takes Sam's hand) Shake, old pal, yo' all done saved 
mah life. 

Sam. I'se say I'se did. 

Bob. Yes, yo' done saved mah life. I'se all done had some 
trouble once befoh and dat was enough foh dis nigger. 

Sam. Yo' all mean to tell me dat you had trouble once be- 
foh, what was yo' trouble? 

Bob. I'se can't tell yo'. 

Sam. Yo' all can trust me, but what am yoh name? 

Bob. My name am Bob Jackson. 

Sam (starts; angrily). Bob Jackson? 

Bob. Yes sah, Bob Jackson. 



B Tickled to Death. 

Sam {starts, aside). De man who murdered my wife. 
{Aloud) And yo' am de nigger who I'se been searchin' foh all 
dese years. 

Bob. Searchin' foh me? Nigger, what do yo' all mean? 

Sam. Yo* all done murdered mah wife. 

Bob (starts). Murdered yoh wife? 

Sam. Yes, yo' done murdered mah wife, stole her wooden; 
leg, false hair and her false teeth. 

Bob. Who, me? 

Sam. Yes, yoh. 

Bob. How do yo' know ? 

Sam. How do I know? 

Bob. Yes, how do yo' know? 

Sam. Her glass eye layed on de table and saw yo'. 

Bob (starts, aside). Discovered. 

Sam (takes two feathers from his pocket and lays them on 
his arm. To Bob) Now choose yoh weppens. (Bob takes 
one. Business. They fight a duel with the two feathers.. Sam 
tickles Bob under the chin and he whirls and falls) 

Bob. Yo' have all done killed me. 

Sam. Me killed yo'? 

Bob. Yes, yo' have done killed me. 

Sam. How have I killed yo'. 

Bob. Yo' have tickled me to death. 

SONG BY BOTH. 
CURTAIN. 



BLACK FACE SKETCHES 



PICKLES AND TICKLES 

Farce in One Act. Six Males 
By Thomas Barnes 
No scenery required. Pickles and Tickles are rival dealers in 
second-hand clothes. Their quarrels, the pranks played by two live 
dummies and the comicalities of " Overanxious " and the " Par- 
son's " ghost, afford ample opportunity to keep the audience in a 
whirlwind of mirth. Will run twenty minutes if played " straight." 

PRICE 15 CENTS 
tn » 

SLIM JIM AND THE HOODOO 

Farce in One Act. Five Males 
By Thomas Barnes 
One interior scene. Full of jokes and abounding in comic " busi- 
ness." A bright negro farce. Specialties can be introduced. Will 
run thirty minutes, if played " straight." 

PRICE 15 CENTS 

A HOLY TERROR 

Farce in One Act. Four Males 

By O. Wenlandt 

One interior scene, or no scene at all. A first class little farce full 

of genuine fun and humor. Will keep an audience in roars of 

laughter. Specialties can be introduced according to convenience and 

talent. Will run thirty minutes if played " straight." 

PRICE 15 CENTS 

h ■ ■ 

THE DARKEY WOOD-DEALER 

Farce in One Act. Two Males, One Female 
By Charles Townsend 
One interior scene. The Wood-Dealer is one of the best negro 
characters on the stage. The Deacon is highly amusing, and Mrs. 
Deacon (this part may be played by a male) a tremendous hit as 
a " strong-minded " female. The farce is certain to keep the audi- 
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PRICE 15 CENTS 

THE NIGGER BOARDING HOUSE 

Farce in One Act. Six Males 

By O. Wenlandt 

One interior scene. The terrible trials and perplexities of a 

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THE NIGGER NIGHT SCHOOL 

Farce in One Act. Six Males 

By Thomas Barnes 

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FUN IN A SCHOOL ROOM 

Farce in One Act. Four Males 

By Hakky E. Shelland 

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- l _ 

A MANAGER'S TRIALS 
Farce in One Act. Nine Males 
By A. L. Fishes 
One interior scene. Daniel Slowman's encounters with the various 
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PRICE 15 CENTS 

MEDICA 

Farce in One Act. Seven Males 
By W. K. Engle 
One interior scene. Runs with a snap from beginning to end- 
there isn't a slow part in it. It is sure to please. It will bring 
down the house wherever played. Plays thirty-five minutes. 
PRICE 15 CENTS 

SNOBSON'S STAG-PARTY 

Farce in One Act. Tivelve Males 

By Levin C. Tees 

One interior scene. The cast includes a Coon, Dutchman, Irisk- 

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will fetch roars of laughter and can be made the medium of all 

kinds of " specialties." Plays " straight," one hour. 

PRICE 15 CENTS 

THE LITTLE RED MARE 

Farce in One Act. Three Males 

By O. E. Young 

One interior scene. By a series of comical episodes the farmer's 

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■ i^t 

THE WARDROBE OF THE KING 

Burlesque in One Act. Eight Males 
By William J. McKiernan 
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